Part X
Even More Things to Remember
on The First Date

Internet dating through numerous websites will allow you to meet people from across the street, and around the world. This is an utterly amazing way of meeting new people, and finding exciting dating opportunities. And maybe, just maybe even find someone with whom you can become emotionally involved. Be cautious about allowing this to happen with someone who lives far away. Long distance dating doesn't have very encouraging statistics. Sometimes these attractions are actually spawned by the distance involved – you want what you can't have. However, before you start up a romance with someone living 1,000 miles away, think about it carefully. Is it really the practical thing to do? Here are some tips for that all important first date:

• Make your questions friendly. You can make the leap from passable conversationalist to good conversationalist just by learning to ask friendly, non-invasive questions. Before your date, go over the other person's profile. Now think of a few questions to ask using that information. This will relax the other person, help you get to know them, and give them a chance to express themselves. And you'll be much more entertaining.

• The evening's attire. This ever so much depends on you and your personal tastes. However, make sure that whatever outfit you decide to don for the big night is something you are comfortable wearing. Better that you be comfortable than GQ or Cosmo. As a rule of thumb, ladies should lean towards a more conservative look for the first date. And gentlemen, clean, neat, and simple wins the race. No need tonight for your fanciest threads, but your socks do need to match. On the left, avoid wearing t-shirts, and on the right, avoid wearing silk. Simple and neat.

• Exude positive energy. Be upbeat, and be sure to smile. Laughter is also good – for them and you. Positive behavior reassures the other person that you're fun and comfortable to be around. And be sincere – good or bad. One of the biggest mistakes people make is to complain about their past. Be there, then – in the present. Be pleasant and polite. Be yourself. The worst thing you can do is try to be what you think they want you to be.

• Timeliness. Showing up late, especially on a first date, shows disorganization, irresponsibility, and worst of all, disrespect. This is a guaranteed turn off. Make a good first impression by being on time. It's no more than you want. Allow yourself an extra fifteen minutes, just to be sure. If you're more than fifteen minutes late, don't expect there to be anyone there.

• Smell good, but not too good. Be conservative with your cologne or perfume. It's not the 70's anymore, and not everyone in the room needs to smell your scent. Besides, smaller amounts make your fragrance much more intimate.

• Confidence is Sexy. How do YOU demonstrate your sense of confidence? Try to remember to maintain good eye contact. Confidence comes across clearly in those who can carry on a pleasant, relaxed conversation. Being sure of who you are is attractive and sexy – and your date will surely notice it!

• Leave Current Events at Home. You really should avoid topics that father opportunity for string disagreements. That time will come later. Stay away form politics, religion, and negative world events, such as war. You don't need to discuss depressing world occurrences to learn about the other person's values, likes and dislikes. Try to remain within the confines of "neutral territory" on the first date.

• Observe and Interpret Their Body Language and React Appropriately. Is your date counting the grain swirls in the wooden table top, instead of listening to you? Are their arms folded in an isolated, closed off posture? Or, are they laughing at your comments, rocking forward, and touching their hair – all good signs! If you're going to date much at all, you really need to master reading your date's signals – physical and verbal. Even if your date doesn't think you're the one, you'll sense their distance, and you'll be able to very charmingly move along to your next dating adventure.

• A Good Night Kiss? Hardly. You're in a public place with someone you don't really know – remember? But the date is over, and you've both seemed to have a good time. If you want to see them again, tell them so, but not in a 'stalker' kind of way. "I had a super time, thanks. I'd really like to get together again." This opens up a next date dialog, but with no pressure.