Drinking - Fun or Foolish?
Tucson Dating & Marriage Advice Circa 1950

Do not try to enjoy liquor for its own sake. Drink is an evil unless it is used in the right way and for the right reasons. However, when carefully studied by the wise but fun-loving male, heterosexual drinking can play a strong part in increasing affection, lowering barriers, and stripping off some of the excess veneer of civilization. Be careful not to strip off too much.

Know Your Liquors

You will soon discover that not one woman in fifty can tell, by taste alone, the difference between Haig and Haig Pinch and Old Plaid Simulated Scotch-type Whiskey, though she'll ask for the former every time. Remember this rule: a woman is happy if she thinks she is drinking the brand of her choice. Nightclub owners have known this for years.

If you can tell the difference yourself, mix the drinks out of sight and take advantage of the real article.
"Will you have Johnny Walker?"
"Yes, Davie, if you have the black. Not the red. There is such a difference."
"Pet, I wouldn't be caught dead with the red label."
Give her Old Plaid. After taking a long draught shell say:
"No question, David, there is such a difference!"
"Rare to find a girl who appreciates good liquor, pet."

Avoid Drunkenness

Know your own capacity and—even more important— that of your women friends. The over-generous host who allows his female companion to become super-saturated will find he has a poor companion. If, on the other hand, you are entertaining a woman of formidable capacity you may have to take precautionary measures. A rack of spare ribs, a piece of toast buttered on both sides, a half cup of melted lard, or other fatty substance, taken shortly before imbibing will prevent giddiness and maintain firmness of purpose. The wise male, for reasons of economy, soon rids himself of girls of this stripe.

"Should I Drink to Forget?"

Though drinking may help you to forget yourself occasionally, it is of small value in blotting out the memory of a pretty face, unless you reach the point at which all faces are blotted out. No need to discuss here the confusion that this can cause.

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